Monday, June 9, 2014

Inspired With Ego

Today I wrote a ridiculously long blog about all the health quirks I employ to feel a whole hell of a lot better than I used to. It got so long and preachy I had to take a step back. But the experience did serve to remind me why I started The Fibromyalgia Crusade in the first place. Hallelujah! I've been in mortal agony over here about my abandoned love-child, and am overjoyed to rediscover her purpose!

Before I had two strokes my Fibro was pretty well managed. After being horribly disabled for a few years, I was working part-time and taking a Spanish class. When I got an A I realized my brain wasn't some fogged out, defunct old organ. It was actually capable of learning new material! I began looking into graduate school, and  I felt like my life might have a future. After I had two strokes I was high on high-dose steroids, to treat the Vasculitis that caused the strokes. I felt fabulous. Although I had to quit my job, drop Spanish 2, regularly spun into roid-rages of epic proportions, and lost my social life entirely, I felt fabulous. I spread the word about this blog for the first time in September 2010. Eventually my mission became to let the world know Fibromyalgia didn't have to ruin a persons life. After all, I was able to fight back once, and win. The Fibromyalgia Crusade was the vehicle through which I planned on delivering this message.

Except...once I got off that drug, my reality got really, really bad. For a really long time. The kind of bad where if one were a cat, most of those nine lives would've been gobbled up. By the grace of God go I. Somehow I've managed to fight back twice, and win. So here I go again. Over the next week or so I'll publish some details on what I've done to get my life back. Remembering my original intention was to let Fibromyalgia patients know Fibromyalgia didn't have to level a person forever, makes me feel outrageously egocentric. It's amazing how hard it is to face ones pompousness, without the shelter of pharmaceuticals to delude the picture! But when I got this illness nobody told me about hope. Nobody stood on top of a mountain of their own success, and told me I had so much more power than I realized. They told me to learn to live with it, accept it, take pills that made me feel worse. A few went so far as to tell me to figure it out on my own. So I did. Today I know so much more than I ever have before, and I know there is no one answer to the complex puzzle of Fibromyalgia. But for anyone who's interested, stay tuned. I'll break down what I did.

Thanks for joining,
Leah   

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