Friday, January 8, 2016

Reboot Pain

Man do I hurt. I haven't been exercising and it's really starting to take a toll, proving to me once again that moving my body is the best pain pill I've found. As my immune system tanked, so did my ability to engage in cardiovascular activities. When I was in the worst of that two-month-long monster flare, my mile-and-a-half morning walk with my dogs turned into a pathetic shuffle around the block. Coupled with the fact that the gym hasn't seen my sorry ass since November, it's no wonder I freaked out and quit my job. Since I'm still knee deep in survival mode, I'm not even really doing yoga. It's all I can do to fulfill the completion of my obligation at work, so I've been put on hold. And man do I hurt. 

Not to mention I've gained ten pounds back. That alone would seemingly send me running to the weight room to bicep curl myself back into my former shape. But I'm not. Then I finally realized I'm so darn terrified of getting that sick again, I'm babying myself. What a delicate balance, this living with chronic illness thing. I have to challenge myself just enough to slowly move my life back toward health, but too much "challenge" sends me flying down the tunnel of unending sickness. For flippin' reals, yo?

So I'm putting down my computer and doing my Namaste Yoga DVD. It's gentle, yet very effective, but given my pain-seeped state is going to hurt like hell. Tomorrow it will hurt a little less, and in the next couple weeks I will hopefully be geared up to go slap around some iron with a bunch of over-inflated muscle heads. It took me two years of yoga to even get back to the gym, and two years of intense cardio weightlifting to get to where I was, but the benefit of having done all that work is a relatively quick recovery. If I start now, don't overdo it, and for the love of all things holy, can somehow avoid another monster flare.

Thanks for joining,


  1. I hear ya Leah. I haven't been to the gym since before my surgery in mid October. I went into full flare mode afterwards along with getting a cold (compliments of my husband), somehow managing to dislocate a rib twice, and then ended up in the ER with costochondritis. (I thought my rib dislocated again and had punctured my lung, the pain was THAT intense. The last few months have not been kind to me. I am tying to change that. Trying yoga again to rebuild some stamina since I've become so weak before going full steam ahead and go to the gym. Trying to retrain this exhausted brain that baby steps are still steps in the right direction even if they aren't as big as I wish they were. I figure if I'm gong to hurt anyway, I'm going to earn it. "As Fat Amy in Pitch Perfect would say, "Crushed it." ;)

    I also can relate to the weight gain. Since June I've gained almost 30 pounds due to meds. And that doesn't include the 100 pounds I have gained since 2001 due to meds. I am hoping beyond hope the yoga will help me with this as I rebuild myslef back up since I can't do cardio.

    Cheering you on for putting the computer down and going to do your yoga. Wishing you a peaceful evening.


    1. Thanks, Bonny. My best to you! Baby steps are forward progress. :)

  2. I'm so proud of you, starting slow with yoga, knowing that if you do it right you'll be back in the gym soon.
    I've never tried exercise, but I do agree, when I'm moving I feel much better. Keeping the house clean,, grocery shopping, doctor appts and the occasional social outing is the extent of my movement. My goal is to get back to doing P.T. for my horrible back issues. Part of that will strengthen my stomach muscles and I'm hoping that will allow me to do the yoga DVD, Yoga for the Rest of Us.
    This plan feels so lame. Before I got sick I did Bikhram Yoga and the Eliptical Trainer for 45 mins a day.
    Given all I've been through I know my body will not tolerate much. I tried following the advise of a really bad trainer 2 years ago, 10 mins on a treadmill at 10% incline @ 1 mph. I was hesitant, but he pushed me so I did it. Yep, ended up in the hospital writhing in pain, needing cortisone injections. For me it always goes back to trusting myself and accepting that my "issues and conditions", as I call them, insist that I have to be very very careful.
    So looking forward to following you as you get your health back!

    1. Precisely why I've never seen a personal trainer. Can't imagine they would "get it." My own pace is all I can do. Hang in there and keep listening to yourself. It's most decidedly NOT lame. :)

  3. I also had terrible muscle pain and was not able to do exercise. After trying loads of medicines I took acupuncture therapy at a professional Mississauga acupuncture clinic and it helped amazingly in treating the pain.

  4. Hi Leah. I also have fibro and CFS. I noticed you look young. How old are you? People tend to misunderstand my illness, as do I. I don't really look sick, but a lot of days I feel pretty crappy. If you want to send me an email I will tell you what i have tried, what helps and what doesn't. Sending hugs. But gentle hugs i know how much hugs can even hurt with this illness.